Thanks Deborah for again sharing your great insights with us. And I fully agree with you that for patients who are too traumatized to speak, the best approach is not to ask them any questions at all about themselves —- as questions might seem judgmental to them. —- and instead just to talk to them about anything, including even scrambled eggs.
But I might add that as a University Professor I found that the best approach to students who were too shy to speak in front of other students was both to get to know them and encourage them to get to know me as a friend, and also to tell them as I told all my students, that questions are as important as answers. My hope was in this way to above all encourage my students to learn how to think for themselves.
But of course, students and patients are not the same. —- although many of my students were likewise traumatized.
Anyways as to your question re. what other topics we would like you to .address, for me it is intimate partner domestic violence, both sexual, physical and emotional violence which is now increasing so fast that we can barely distinguish the victims from the survivors. And the damage and traumatizing of these women and often also their children will be very difficult for even you to ever heal.
But many thanks for trying so hard to help us feel more hopeful about ourselves and this troubled world of ours that we human beings have so fucked up.
If you like your scrambled eggs fluffy, add 1 tbs. of water to the eggs when you beat them. Whatever you'r doing that works, keep doing that, if it doesn't work, do something else. Working with diferent people in different settings, requires different methods. The worst therapists are the ones who keep doing the same things over and over regardless of the outcome. I think your doing ok. Do you know Harry Browne's book, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World?
For about 15 years we operated B&B style Inns. State O' Maine. I made something called "Cheddar Egg Pillows". A dozen eggs, a glug of half and half, a hefty handful of shredded cheddar, a glob of sour cream. Mix. Heat a hunk of butter in a large non stick (no PFAs) pan with LOW HEAT.
Don't touch them! Don't stir! As they solidify, gently break them up into small pillows. Turn once. Lower the heat. When all liquid has solidified, remove to warming dish. Garnish with paprika.
This letter, like all of yours, is interesting, thought provoking and encourages me to re-examine my interaction with people I consider myself close to. It is accurately said that when we stop learning, we start dying and today's letter has postponed that day for me.
My advice is keep doing what you are doing. Your writing is a window to your heart and it is a good heart. That is enough.
Everyone wants to feel validated. Your approach is perfect.
Thanks Deborah for again sharing your great insights with us. And I fully agree with you that for patients who are too traumatized to speak, the best approach is not to ask them any questions at all about themselves —- as questions might seem judgmental to them. —- and instead just to talk to them about anything, including even scrambled eggs.
But I might add that as a University Professor I found that the best approach to students who were too shy to speak in front of other students was both to get to know them and encourage them to get to know me as a friend, and also to tell them as I told all my students, that questions are as important as answers. My hope was in this way to above all encourage my students to learn how to think for themselves.
But of course, students and patients are not the same. —- although many of my students were likewise traumatized.
Anyways as to your question re. what other topics we would like you to .address, for me it is intimate partner domestic violence, both sexual, physical and emotional violence which is now increasing so fast that we can barely distinguish the victims from the survivors. And the damage and traumatizing of these women and often also their children will be very difficult for even you to ever heal.
But many thanks for trying so hard to help us feel more hopeful about ourselves and this troubled world of ours that we human beings have so fucked up.
If you like your scrambled eggs fluffy, add 1 tbs. of water to the eggs when you beat them. Whatever you'r doing that works, keep doing that, if it doesn't work, do something else. Working with diferent people in different settings, requires different methods. The worst therapists are the ones who keep doing the same things over and over regardless of the outcome. I think your doing ok. Do you know Harry Browne's book, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World?
For about 15 years we operated B&B style Inns. State O' Maine. I made something called "Cheddar Egg Pillows". A dozen eggs, a glug of half and half, a hefty handful of shredded cheddar, a glob of sour cream. Mix. Heat a hunk of butter in a large non stick (no PFAs) pan with LOW HEAT.
Don't touch them! Don't stir! As they solidify, gently break them up into small pillows. Turn once. Lower the heat. When all liquid has solidified, remove to warming dish. Garnish with paprika.
In the gathering twilight a cardiologist weeps.
But is writing down the recipe.
And at your next physical, you may be prescribed a statin.
Don't take it, take Red Yeast Rice instead. 10 Mg. daily for 30 days brought my wife's collesterol within normal range.
Even Job had friends who just sat with him.
This letter, like all of yours, is interesting, thought provoking and encourages me to re-examine my interaction with people I consider myself close to. It is accurately said that when we stop learning, we start dying and today's letter has postponed that day for me.