How can I become a more grateful person?

When we were children, we were taught to say “Thank you.”

Some of us were even taught to write thank you letters!

Do you remember being sat down to do that?
Does thanking someone still feel like a duty, not a joy?

To appear civilized, we know we must say thank you.
But unless our words come from a grateful heart they are empty.

How often do we say thank you with words that are full?
Full of genuine love and genuine gratitude?

If our answer is: Not very often,
the problem is not with our words, but with our heart.

A full heart overflows.

So maybe the question we need to ask is:

How can I have a full heart?

Someone to thank

I don’t remember being grateful as I was growing up.
I didn’t think about all the beauty I was receiving from my loving parents.
My meals, my warm bed, my house, my yard to play in, my books, my cat.
I just lived day to day, with no awareness of any reason or need to be thankful.

I wasn’t raised with any religious teaching.
My father was a Christian, my mother a Unitarian.
She said I would figure it out for myself
(for which freedom I am forever grateful.)

It wasn’t until I was 26, after I had given birth to two babies,
that I was hit with the sudden awareness:
I have been given two beautiful children!!!

These babies came through my body,
but I certainly didn’t create them!

They were given to me.

I was stunned.
It was a shocking revelation.
It led to a strong feeling: I need someone to thank!

This was the beginning of a spiritual search
that led to my becoming a Christian.
I finally became able to express the gratitude I felt
for being given my precious children.

No one told me I should be grateful.
I became grateful all on my own
by realizing the beauty of what I had been given.

What are we unaware of?

A heart full of gratitude is built with awareness.

Our heart begins to fill with gratitude as we become aware
of the gifts we are receiving.

So, let me ask you…
what are you receiving today?

Are you perhaps receiving gifts and blessings
that you have not really thought about?

Is there someone who is giving to you
that you do not see?

And…

Is it also possible that you are giving and not being noticed?

Try asking yourself:
Am I being a blessing to someone who does not see me?

If you are, how does it feel to be invisible?

Not so good, huh.

So…

let’s make sure no one is feeling invisible
while they are being a blessing to us.

Our gifts of freedom

Freedom is probably the gift we are least aware of.
The one we most take for granted.

Our freedom feels as natural as breathing
–till there’s no oxygen in it.

In her song Big Yellow Taxi
Joni Mitchell sings:

Don’t it always seem to go
That you don’t know what you got till it’s gone

Like the precious trees in her song,
our freedom is vulnerable.

Protecting our trees and our freedom in the years ahead
is going to take all of us working together.

It will take all our grateful hearts, giving our best.

Let’s make sure we realize all the blessings that we have!

We have our hard won freedom as American citizens,
based in the Declaration of Independence and in our Constitution.

We also have all the simple everyday freedoms
we tend to realize only after they are gone:

Our simple freedoms

We lose our job, and we think:
“Wow, it was wonderful when I was free of fear
about having enough money to pay for my food and rent.”

We have physical pain, and we say:
“Wow, it was wonderful when I was free of this painful suffering.”

Our dog dies, and we remember:
“Wow, it was wonderful when me and Roscoe ran free every day in the park!”

We get a serious diagnosis, and we realize:
“Wow, it was wonderful when I was free of dread
and didn’t live under this shadow.”

So let’s ask ourselves:
Am I grateful now,
during the good times when I have most of my lovely freedoms?

Time to open our eyes

I’m unaware. You’re unaware.
Each of us is unaware in our own way.

Can we open our eyes today and see how free we are?

Can we be grateful in our hearts for all the freedom we have
and then look at what is missing
and still needs to be built?

Can we open our eyes to see the good
in ourselves and in our fellow citizens,
especially those we disagree with?

Can we be grateful for all the blessings we share
so we can work together to find our common ground?

Can we open our eyes and see the light surrounding us?
—as Dylan sings in Forever Young.

As we become more aware of all we are being given,
who we thank is up to each of us.

With our grateful hearts
we shall build this beautiful world together.

Dr. Hall

Question:

Is there something you are feeling grateful for
that you have become more aware of receiving?