Have you ever found yourself unable to go on?
You were in the midst of doing something so extremely hard
that it took everything you had.
And suddenly there was no more.
Your gas tank was so empty
there weren’t even any fumes to run on.
You were simply unable to go further.
I have had that experience several times in my life.
It’s freaking scary.
One heck of a shock, especially if–like me–you think you have no limits
…and find out you DO.
It’s humbling, daunting, and very painful.
The 2022 Race
I am a duathlete.
The duathlon is an endurance sport
where you run, then bike, then run again.
It’s a triathlon without the swimming.
In August 2022 I raced the Olympic Duathlon in Cleveland.
You had to run 2 miles, bike 25 miles, then run 6.2 miles.
I made it through everything until about 3 miles into the last run…
and suddenly I was unable to go on.
Wow what a shock.
A total kick in the gut.
I had trained hard all year for this Race and I was sure I would finish!!!
But I couldn’t do it.
Fast forward a year
In August 2023 I was coming up on the same Race.
I was going back to Cleveland to race the Olympic Duathlon again,
utterly determined to finish it this time.
So, I asked my coach: “What did you do when you were unable to go on?”
I figured he knew, since he had successfully completed an Ironman Triathlon
when he was 50.
In an Ironman you have to swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 miles, then run 26.22 miles.
I figured he must have come up against his limits somewhere in there!
Here’s what he said:
1) I decided to wear sunglasses so I could stay inside myself
and not get distracted.
2) I repeated over and over: “Just keep going.”
3) I prayed continuously: “Thank you, God, for all my blessings
past, present and future.”
4) As I was climbing the worst hills on my bike,
I shouted “NO! NO! NO!” to all the doubts inside me
that were telling me I couldn’t do it.
Why was this a winning strategy?
I thought about what my coach said.
I concluded that essentially
he had built himself a psychological and spiritual fortification.
First, he set a psychological boundary.
He took responsibility for his own Race
by staying entirely focused inside his own mind.
He was not competing with others.
Indeed, he was not even noticing them!
Then, he continuously encouraged himself with optimistic words.
“Just keep going” meant as long as he did that, he would make it!
“Just keep going” was in effect his success mantra.
All the while, he expressed gratitude.
By thanking God for all his blessings, past present and future,
he was giving the credit to God for his strength and for the outcome.
He was acknowledging he could not DO these extreme feats ALONE!!!
His thankfulness was also an expression of faith.
It meant he believed he would receive from God
the strength he needed to continue.
In sum, he was running on faith, not on fumes.
My 2024 Race
I won’t keep you in suspense. I finished.
I was the only woman in my age group to complete the Olympic Duathlon.
How did I do it?
I essentially followed my coach’s strategy
and added one more element:
I made a vow.
I vowed to myself and to my husband that I would finish no matter what.
I never break my vows, so as far as I was concerned that sealed it.
To my shock, the 2024 Race turned out to be
WAY tougher than the previous year,
due to high winds and extreme heat and sun.
I had to pedal uphill three times into a headwind so strong I was barely moving,
in 80+ degrees in full sun.
Each time in a more exhausted condition than the time before.
As I rode up I hollered “Thank you, Jesus!”
and I didn’t care who heard me.
Other racers got off their bikes
and walked up some of those hills.
Like my coach, I did the whole thing on faith.
I made it to the Finish Line on gratitude and determination.
Regardless of how you summon your strength,
victory is sweet.
What is victory?
Victory is our reward for keeping going when we are unable to go on.
But what is our victory, really?
It may look like our victory is the medal,
or the degree,
or the marriage,
or the job,
or the completion of chemotherapy,
or the resurrection of our spirit after the heart break of loss and grief,
or the survival of our soul through whatever other life crisis
that was so painful and hard that we could not continue…yet we did…
But our victory is more than the specific outcome we achieved.
We built something far beyond that.
We built our courage.
We built our capability to do things beyond our limits.
We built our confidence in ourselves
by proving we can count on ourselves
when we face the worst things life holds.
It is this growth in our courage that is our true reward.
Our priceless prize for not giving up.
The courage we built when we were unable to go on
stays with us for the rest of our life
and is always there for us
when we need it.
Dr. Hall
Question:
What is it that you need most,
when you are feeling that you can’t go on?
A breath, and a moment to reset. Whenever I'm confronted with the wall that we all hit sometimes, I step back and consider the ways I've gotten over such barriers in the past. Faith supports the conviction that I will do it again. There is only one insurmountable wall in life, and the Reward on the other side makes all the trials we face here worth the experience.
Hi Deborah. This is really cool. Thanks for your inspiration.
Are you familiar with David Goggins? Or Jocko Willink? Both are former Navy SEALS who are in the popular culture space. Both have the "conquer your mind" mindset.
Goggins' story is amazing. So is Willink's. Jocko has always said "discipline eats motivation for breakfast." Pretty strong statement.
Neither man gets their mental strength from faith, but have retrained their minds to conquer whatever obstacle is before them. To my mind, whatever your source of strength, draw from it! Use it.